Why leaders avoid hard conversations, and what it costs

The second category, Millard said, involves personal struggles – illness, mental health, domestic violence, loss, and fertility struggles among them. “As it’s all so personal and everyone has a different story, leaders often don’t know what to say, worry about saying the wrong thing, or feel it’s not their place,” she said. “So instead, nothing gets said and the elephant in the room gets quietly pushed into the fridge with the door being firmly shut.”

The third, and most overlooked, are peer-to-peer conversations at senior levels, Millard said. “Leaders avoid addressing issues with each other because they don’t want to rock the boat, don’t have the energy, or are simply focused on getting through and collecting their pay cheque,” she said.

The cost of staying silent

The consequences of avoidance extend well beyond individual discomfort, Millard warned. “When difficult conversations are avoided, trust erodes. People don’t feel safe to speak up, so they put the proverbial mask on and keep performing. But you can’t switch off what’s going on internally. When things are left unsaid, they don’t disappear, they build.”

The financial scale of disengagement is significant. Gallup’s State of the Global Workplace 2025 report found global employee engagement fell from 23% to 21% in 2024, costing the world economy an estimated $438 billion in lost productivity – only the second decline of its kind in 12 years. Gallup also estimated that lifting global engagement to the level of “exceptional workplace” organisations could unlock $9.6 trillion in productivity, equivalent to roughly 9% of global GDP.

Millard cautioned, however, that encouraging people to speak up is only half the equation. “We also need to equip people to do it well and safely,” she said. “If you feel uncomfortable raising something, take someone with you. Have a peer, HR or another leader present to support the conversation, take notes, or, if appropriate and agreed, record the discussion.” Poorly handled conversations carry their own risks, she added, particularly for mental health and wellbeing.